tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2463821164071640037.post6239868205689223515..comments2023-04-09T02:23:39.420-07:00Comments on Malvern Wells Class 4 Blog : Mission ImpossibleMr Warnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07867647685037409276noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2463821164071640037.post-26969706973086211532015-02-04T12:40:08.465-08:002015-02-04T12:40:08.465-08:00I like how you introduced yourself at the beginnin...I like how you introduced yourself at the beginning, you might need to go other your spelling mistakes and you need to add in a few comma's. Other wise it is a really nice piece of writing, if you want to chanllenge yourself then you could try and write it as one of the enemies!!<br />Poppy from Suckley SchoolAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2463821164071640037.post-17753112574893694192015-01-16T06:08:28.309-08:002015-01-16T06:08:28.309-08:00I liked your piece of work because of the vocabula...I liked your piece of work because of the vocabulary choices especially the phrase 'The shot of truth'. I think that you need to look at characters so that you can work on your description. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2463821164071640037.post-23735871210855636812015-01-16T05:58:24.609-08:002015-01-16T05:58:24.609-08:00I think that I used punctuation well to control th...I think that I used punctuation well to control the reader but need to check certain spellings. I now need to develop characters within my writing. <br />Hattiesburg Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2463821164071640037.post-37733287650719420082015-01-16T05:56:07.533-08:002015-01-16T05:56:07.533-08:00You could use a wider range of punctuation but I l...You could use a wider range of punctuation but I like the way you did the sleep dart Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2463821164071640037.post-48802243696337251092015-01-16T05:50:59.459-08:002015-01-16T05:50:59.459-08:00It is action packed and exciting but the fragment ...It is action packed and exciting but the fragment "the target shot his gun but likely he missed and shoot the door"Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2463821164071640037.post-40619687353259886552015-01-16T05:46:26.873-08:002015-01-16T05:46:26.873-08:00Try to add wider range of phctuatonTry to add wider range of phctuatonAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2463821164071640037.post-88467709498915686972015-01-16T05:45:23.891-08:002015-01-16T05:45:23.891-08:00There was some good description. Having the prompt...There was some good description. Having the prompt right at the end created good suspense. In one of the 007noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2463821164071640037.post-60945731505255175632015-01-16T05:45:02.713-08:002015-01-16T05:45:02.713-08:00It was action packed and draws the reader in. I es...It was action packed and draws the reader in. I especially liked how fast paced it was,but make saw you read your work out lowed.WELL DONEAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2463821164071640037.post-91614631753696301292015-01-16T05:41:58.784-08:002015-01-16T05:41:58.784-08:00We'll done hattie good use of punctuation. But...We'll done hattie good use of punctuation. But it is shot not shoot. We'll done good piece of writing.<br /><br />Oscar Curtis Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2463821164071640037.post-43826714095520540912015-01-16T05:40:14.256-08:002015-01-16T05:40:14.256-08:00Good work with accursed punctuation Good work with accursed punctuation Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2463821164071640037.post-62057230083586366962015-01-16T05:39:52.153-08:002015-01-16T05:39:52.153-08:00I really liked all of the action you put in your w...I really liked all of the action you put in your work. You have missed a few comma's here and there. I loved the fact you used the word crept instead of walked. Also, did you mean to put luckily instead of likely. Over all I really loved your writing. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2463821164071640037.post-88709382978727511672015-01-16T05:35:23.721-08:002015-01-16T05:35:23.721-08:00I liked it because you used punctuation but you co...I liked it because you used punctuation but you could have used a wider range of punctuation Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com