The policeman
Darren had only been staying there for at least two weeks and was already planning his escape. Suddenly the prisoner spotted a loose brick in the old wall as he paced around the room thinking up clever escape plan. He headed straight for the loose brick and pulled it through to his prison cell. Darren tugged and dug at the the brick below and finally set that one free too!
After a while he could just about squeeze through the small hole to freedom. As Darren stepped through the tiny space to his left he suddenly caught a glimpse of a massive, strong and tough looking policeman. Darren set off with a speedy pace racing quickly. Sooner or later the policeman caught up. Petrified, exhausted breathless, he ran as fast as humanly possible, for dread that this might be the end.
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I really love this writing! I loved the fact you used pace instead of run. Hoy missed a couple of comma's here and there. Other than that I really enjoyed this!
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