It was a normal Sunday
here in the military school of war. That's a brilliant place for a
eight year old to grow up, especially as the Amy depot next door was
packed with weapons and explosives, not very safe - I think you’d
agree. However, I survived up in till now at least.
Crashing through the
undergrowth searching desperately for an escape. thud thump thud. My
heart was beating like a drum. It was Mr. Warne the terrible
gardener.
Petrified, exhausted,
breathless, I ran as fast as humanly possible, for dread that this
might be the end........but it wasn't.
Good punctuation and I like the ... near the end.
ReplyDeleteit was brilliant. love to no what happens next.
ReplyDeleteClara from the wyche school
Clara from the Wyche school
Do you know thud at the start of the sentence that needs a capital letter.Could you put a ellipses at the end of the story.
ReplyDeleteCould you put a question mark in ? very good story
ReplyDeleteCraig
Thud at the start of the sentence needs a capital and also you need to put a , when you put thud, thump, thud. I like how you haven't ended it like everyone else.
ReplyDeletePoppy from Suckley School